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The wedding ceremony unity candle is a symbol of two lives becoming one. There are many variations on how the unity ceremony is performed. Three candles are used, two small (taper candles) and one larger church candle (which is placed in between the two taper candles). It is not a traditional part of the Catholic wedding ceremonies. Most unity candles were used in Protestant churches and wedding ceremonies that did not take place in a church. Many Catholic churches do make the unity candle ceremony part of the wedding; you will have to check with the priest if the candle ceremony is permitted in his church.
The candles can be placed on the altar or a small table at the front of the church, the priest will let you know where.
We had a unity candle ceremony at our wedding and we also had a unity candle ceremony at our reception using the same candles that were used in the church.
We asked our mothers to be part of the ceremony. The taper candles were lit before the liturgy of the word. The priest invited our mothers to light the candles and place the candles on the candle sticks provided.
While this is being done a song may be sung or played, or the priest will recite an appropriate poem.
These two candles symbolise the light, the love and the hope both parents have given to the new generation.
We then lit the unity candle after our vows and the blessing and exchanging of rings. We did this by going to the altar and extinguished the candles that had been lit by our mothers. Then we lit the third candle.
The lighting of the third candle symbolizes the new generation commencing to provide light, love and peace.
The extinguishing of the taper candles or leaving the candles lit before the third candle is lighted is an individual thing. Some couples believe that putting out the flame symbolizes that their individual lives have come to an end, while others believe putting out the flame shows their devotion to the commitment they have for each other.
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